Nothing works Chris Chase into a frothy lather quite like the sight of J.J. Redick running around in a Duke uniform. Watching the talented senior inspired Chris to imagine that he was J.J. himself and write this piece of poetry:
The bouncing basketball echoes through the gym,
But maybe it’s merely my heart.
Fans cheering, coaches yelling, players running,
And me: The Napoleon of the court.
I soar like a condor. Free. Freer.
But my soul is brittle. Like peanuts.
Or an old person’s bones.
Why do they hate me?
Fear of nominal alliteration?
My Caesar haircut?
Or can it be they love me?
My passion, my inspiration, my commitment.
My soul is filled to bursting.
Bursting!
Bursting!
Bursting!
Parting! Which is what I now must do.
Chris Collins is knocking on my door.
If that weren’t enough, Chris also subjected himself to a long night of Duke and Dick Vitale, just so we could read this.
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